Country Cooties

I have heard the American Harvester country song two days in a row. I don’t choose to listen to country music but happened to be in situations when it was on the radio. Country music writers must think outside the lyrics’ box because who else would write a song about an American Harvester and somehow manage to work in the FFA and 4-H.

I suppose this is encouraging to young song writers because few topics are off limits. There could be songs about dogs pooping in the neighbor’s yard, an alligator eating a poodle (hmmm, maybe better as a ‘gator chomping a mutt), cooties tasting yummy when the food runs out. For example:

Cookin' up some cooties,
Mama says they’re fine.
Better than empty stomachs,
Wash it down with wine.

Daddy’s gone a huntin’,
Hope he’s back real soon.
Cooties ain’t gonna hold me
‘Til lunch time next noon.

Crunchin’, munchin, hollerin’ to eat
Sister ain’t bathin so we always have cootie meat.

Open up a restaurant,
Servin’ cootie food.
Makin’ lots of money
Offa hungry city dudes.

Fry ‘em, boil ‘em, bake ‘em real brown
Heapin’ plates of cooties pass ‘em all around.