I made the mistake of talking to someone at the coffee shop. I try to avoid the downtown area except when absolutely necessary. I meet a friend for coffee each Tuesday afternoon andI am safe if I leave after meeting her for coffee. I can get out of the coffee place without having to meet up with someone I don't want to talk to. I have driven to the next town to do grocery shopping when I am in an anti-social mood (okay, more anti-social than usual). I don't want to run into people I know in the grocery store. I don't want to waste time hiding down an aisle to avoid people. Once in awhile I will meet up with someone I am happy to see but that is rare.
Being in a good mood today, happy it is the holidays, holding the Christmas spirit close to my heart I made the mistake of going out of my way to say hello to an acquaintance at the coffee shop. The last 25 times I have spoken with her the conversation has gone well. Today was short, brief and not warm and fuzzy. I left feeling puzzled and hurt. I realize this is probably not about me but something going on in her life so tried not to let it get to me.
Then I met up with a former close friend. We are still friendly but not close any longer. Having not learned from the first incident, I again went out of my way to say hello. We were friendly but there was no depth to the conversation and I felt it was forced. We parted. I felt icky.
On to the grocery store. I wanted fish tonight so went for tilapia which I have purchased at this store many times. Today, no tilapia. I picked out a salmon fillet which smells fishy in my refrigerator. Is it supposed to smell fishy? Tilapia doesn't smell fishy. That should have been my clue that my karma for NL was not good today. In the check out line I got to feel icky again. Behind me in line was a person I genuinely like but chatting today was not going well. I felt like I should keep up the conversation when it was clear he was not in a conversant mood. Being me, I am sure he wasn't as happy to see me as I was him.
I am now home with my faithful dog. I don't need to breath downtown NL air for awhile. I may need to bring out the baseball cap the next time I go downtown.
1 year ago