Value of Hope

After 100 days in office Barack Obama is one of the most popular Presidents ever and holds a 61% approval rating. Of course there is criticism of what he has or hasn't done in this short time period, but there is agreement that the man has provided the country with hope. People feel an optimism they haven't felt for a long time.

Napolean Bonaparte stated, "A leader is a dealer in hope." If this is true, than Barack Obama is a true leader. Obama campaigned on the message of hope and change; at the time of his election this country was desperate for new leadership, a new vision, and hope. Part of Obama's success is from his essance, his ability to communicate, to remain unflappable, to stay in communication with the media and public. At the very least he gives the impression of working on issues.

The President is what this country needs at this time; he is fresh and has not spent decades entrenched in politics. Yes, he is a politician, but he not part of a political dynasty, is untainted by a long political past and scandal, and is a fresh face (in every way) for the country and world to see. And the country and the world is willing to be patient and allow him to the time he needs to make progress.

I am slightly obsessed with Barack Obama and his family, reading everything I can about them. I don't care that his PR machine is orchastrating photo ops. Every President has a PR machine. Michelle Obama is a fabulous role model, the girls adorable, the dog completing the "all American family" image. We Americans can be very shallow and if being distracted by this family is a way to make us feel better, I'm enjoying it. Every little feel good moment during this Great Recession is welcome.

I am still wanting to have dinner with the First Family. Heck, if hope is the name of the game, I will continue to hope. I am thinking of writing a letter inviting myself to dinner. I don't want to be invited to a formal event as that is not me. Just a little sit down family dinner ....

Suze Orman

An update on my Needs post. I did skim the Suze Orman book at B&N and was underwhelmed. Nothing new that I haven't heard a dozen plus times before on the news, in magazines, etc. I'm not suggesting that this advice is useless but using it depends on a person's life outlook.

One faithful reader recommended that I continue to visit my children regardless of the cost, and I definitely agree. My children are the most important people in my life plus will be picking out my nursing home, so I want to continue my close relationship with them.

Another reader suggested I am either delusional or have an excellent financial planner. Both may be true. I do have a great financial planner and sometimes I even listen to his advice. I don't like reality so possibly the delusional description is true. But, believe me, my delusional world makes me happy, and I spent too much of my life being unhappy. Trust me, money doesn't make one happy; life may be easier in some ways, but happier? No.

Bottom line is unless I cut out my more expensive luxuries, I am not going to save much money. I'm not cutting out cable because I enjoy my plasma TV and all it offers. I'm not reducing my cell phone plan because it allows me contact with my children and the friends whom I actually enjoy. I am not reducing the temperature of the thermostat when I'm awake and at home because I refuse to be cold. I do reduce it at night when sleeping and when gone. I obsessively turn off the lights, don't run water when brushing my teeth, and don't rush to turn on AC although these are more concessions to the environment than to bills.

I do not live extravagantly, I don't have a lot of debt, and I live in one of the more reasonable cost of living areas in the US. I am a moderately conservative investor, so my retirement fund investments haven't suffered as much as others. Yes, I give more thought to money than I did even a year ago. I have cut back on some little things and do not shop are heartily as I used to but am not kidding myself to think they will make a huge difference. I am going to agree with the other faithful reader who reminded me that I can't take it with me. If I want a latte, then I'm going to have a latte. Life really is too short not to enjoy it. Does that mean I won't enjoy my later years because of my lackadaisical attitude now? Maybe. But, nothing in life is certain.

Needs

What are needs? Besides the basic life needs. Someone I know finished reading Suze Orman's 2009 Action Plan and apparently she gives suggestions on safeguarding your money. From what I understand, one should only purchase "needed" things. This, of course, led me to ask, "What is a need?"

Possibly, one person's need is an other's want.. or vice versa. Does a city dweller need a car if public transportation is available? Does a college student need a personal computer if computers are available at the university? These are possibly bigger needs v. wants.

I understand that having cable TV is a want. Purchasing books rather than getting them from the library is a want (although the book stores would sorely miss my revenue). Having my hair colored at a salon rather than coloring it at home is a want.

Shallow wants/needs are a bit harder to discern. Do I switch from gourmet teas to Lipton if Lipton is cheaper? Do I stop wearing mascara to save money? Do I stop driving 2-4 hours to see my kids because the cost of gas adds up? And do making any of these changes really result in significant savings?

I'm getting twitchy just typing this because I have long held the "my wants are my needs" philosophy. Yes, I've been spoiled. Do I think I need to strongly assess my wants v. needs? Yes, probably so. But, (she whined) it is so hard!!

I struggle with the idea of saving for retirement because I don't know how long I will live. What if the world really does end in 2012 (according to the Mayans), and I've been putting money away for naught. I understand that material things don't buy happiness. But if I'm going to bother with retirement funds I'd like to be able to experience the joy of spending them.

The way I see it, in order to really stick to needs, I must cut out cable, buying books and magazines, buy store coffee rather than gourmet coffee and tea, use only the card supplies I have rather than buying more. I could groom my dog myself, color my own hair, stop getting facials, massages, and pedicures (I don't get them often), not buy new clothes or shoes and use what I have. I would stop buying lattes, expensive eye shadow, candles, plants, and would stop going out to eat. But, would I enjoy my life as much? At age 54 am I to stop doing what I enjoy?

Hard questions for each to answer. I'm trying....I more often fail to say no to wants than I succeed, but I am trying. I'm going to save money by not buying Suze's book but may browse it at B&N. Maybe then I'll have a better grasp of the concept.

Taxes

My family did not have much money when I was growing up. My father went to school on the GI Bill and my mother stayed home with us kids. My father became a teacher, my mother went to school to become a teacher; there was not much spare change for extras. My parents did not fight about the lack of earnings because my father believed it was senseless to argue about what they didn't have. My financial planner knows my parents so understands the origins of my nonchalance about investments. Understands, not appreciates.

This attitude carries over to my feelings about taxes. I took my tax information to the accountant today so he can prepare the documents that I am too phobic to configure. There should not be any surprises this year but whether I'm paying in or getting back, my reaction to tax time is the same each year. There is little I can do about taxes so to complain is a grand waste of my time.

We live in a country that provides much for its citizens and those provisions cost money. I appreciate the highways and roads, the educational institutions,the parks, protections provided by the armed forces, police and fire departments. I have freedoms people in other countries envy, and I decided long ago that paying my taxes was what I/we do to ensure our country keeps running. No, I'm not always happy with how my tax dollars are spent but that goes with the territory. Are there better ways in which to tax citizens? Maybe. But I don't expect to see a change in taxes during my lifetime.

I also like my accountant. I don't pretend to understand the tax forms and tend to understand the system intuitively. I have numbers and notes scribbled on pieces of paper, he cheerfully takes them, and doesn't make me feel stupid. I also called late last week for today's appointment and was assured there was ample time for him to do the taxes. That was great news! He charges half the price of H&R Block, I enjoy chatting with him, and he will get my taxes to me in time for filing.

Most friends think I'm nuts for this outlook. That's okay.

My Heart Hurts

My worst nightmare as a parent would be the death of one of my children. I cannot imagine surviving that.

My high school next door neighbor died in a car accident when we were seniors in college. My mother told me it was not natural to have a child die before the parent. While probably not fully appreciating the comment at the time, it stuck with me, and as a parent I fully understand what she meant.

This morning my son called to tell me one of his friends died last night. The boy was a freshman at the same college my son attends and had been at Patrick's house two nights ago. I have known LM and his parents since the boys began playing soccer in elementary school. His mom, JM, and I had taken the kids to movies and swimming when they were younger. I ache for her.

Does it matter how one dies? In the long run, no. A child's death is horrific. But the rumors and innuendos that surround some deaths only exacerbates a painful time. Early reports indicate that LM died from a overdose. An overdose of what is not clear although alcohol seems to be the likely substance. Alcohol poisoning of college students is, unfortunately, not uncommon, but when it is one of your own, none of that matters.

I want to ease my child's pain, I want to comfort my friend, I want to show support in any manner I can. How I do that will become clearer as the day progresses, but for right now my heart hurts. It hurts for another chip in my son's innocence, for the sorrow leaving his girlfriend speechless, for the agony I know LM's mom is experiencing.

To my children: I love you with all my heart and wish to keep you safe. To my friends: I hope you never experience this pain. To all of us: always tell those you love that you care because we never know when it will the last chance to do so.

Favor

I have undertaken a new project and am having great fun with it. While browsing employment sites I stumbled across Examiner.com which is a go-to site for local information and events. It is an interesting site which, at this time, covers 60 major markets across the country.

I am part of the Milwaukee, Wisconsin, market even though my title is Fox River Valley Boutique Shopper Examiner. (quite the mouthful!) The geographic area I cover is Appleton, Neenah, Menasha, Oshkosh, and possibly Green Bay.

I have a favor to ask. Would you be so kind as to take a peek at my articles periodically? Examiner.com is a pay per view site which means I am paid for how many times my articles are viewed. I am in the early stages of writing and have published 4 articles thus far. My aim is to publish 4 articles or more per week. Any constructive feedback would be appreciated -- yes, even criticism!

To find my website, click here. Thank you!!

Annoying Bird

I enjoy watching birds although I won't go as far as to say I'm a "bird watcher." No, "Hark" in the woods for me, but as a casual observer I have favorites I smile to see.

Cardinals and chickadees are two favorites. Mr. Cardinal's (started calling the male cardinal that when the kids were little) song and bright color appeal while the chickadee's call and spunky attitude perk up winter days. Red poles, golden finches, and blue birds all have the color component going for them. So do blue jays and while they can be obnoxious, they are fun to watch hop about. Another favorite is the rarely seen orange and black oriole. That bird takes my breathe away.

In the "power bird" category red tail or marsh hawks and owls awe me. The soaring, swooping flight, keen eyesight, and larger size demand respect. While not a predatory bird, the great blue heron's size, long legs, and crooked neck give it a commanding appearance, and I always "ooooh" when I see one. Kingfishers and snowy egrets cause the same reaction. The above mentioned birds are just plain wow-worthy.

Now, there are a few birds that drive me crazy. I respect a crow's intelligence although when they caw at 6:30 in the morning I am less than thrilled with them. But today the bird highest on my annoyance list is the killdeer. This bird's instinct to run the opposite direction from their nest might make sense in theory but any human familiar with the bird is not fooled by this behavior. And while the killdeer is running away from the next it is yelling in its high pitched killdeer voice.

What did I hear this afternoon out my patio door (which was, Halleluia, open because it was 68 degrees outside) but the squawking of not one, not two, but three killdeer in the backyard. Aye yay yay. Is this threesome (birdy menage a trois?) going to nest in my garden area or at the base of the neighbor's trees? Their mating season begins in March, so they are probably scouting out birthing rooms.

Maybe I'll grow to love their endless hysteria. If not, I'll try to remind myself that at least its not a family of skunks who have adopted my yard.